Harassed

I recently watched a video of a woman walking down the streets of New York, being harassed a total of 108 times in ten hours! I also watched the one titled ‘man in New York’ walking and sharing his experience. The original and the parody, both are doing the rounds on the net, being posted and reposted, commented and condemned, by millions around the world.

In just about 24 hours since the ‘experiment’ was conducted by actress Shoshana B.Roberts, the video has attracted over 15 million views on the net. Whoa! All hail the power of the mighty Internet.

As I watched a straight-faced Shoshana walking down the streets of New York, as she is sometimes greeted but mostly cat-called, harassed and stalked, all with a stoic nonchalance. I couldn’t help but think of the many times I had to watch my back on the street, at the bus stop, in the movie theater, in the elevator and I can go on.. because some men feel that they can whistle, cat-call, sing , leer, stare and even paw off at me or any other girl. All this because some men seem to confuse the public spaces to be their personal ‘harems’ to which they have unlimited access! It’s not just frustrating but scary at times and it doesn’t help that some can go from zero to ‘outrage’ in ten seconds.

Shoshana walks with a single-minded determination to ‘expose’ the daily ordeal of a woman on streets. The barrage of comments on the video ranged from sympathy, to apology, to pointing out her ‘vanity’ and took a dangerous turn to the ‘rape threats’! Boy that escalated quickly!

A ‘rape threat’, really? For a video on sexual harassment? Oh the irony! or Oh the patriarchy?

Let’s see, an exposé on sexual harassment  can have truly diverse opinions and responses. It could be empathy, denial or even dismissal but CAN rape be one of them? Since when did it become an option? Or has it been the case all along? The real issue now is not so much the offense (i.e., the ordeal of that woman on the street…) It is the fact that, the response to it is an even bigger offense. Too confusing? Quite like the issue itself. On the one hand, men and women all over the world who watched Emma Watson deliver the heart-felt speech at the UN HeForShe campaign, are loving or/and hating, but at-least talking about the dreaded ‘F’ word- ‘feminism’. On the other, the ‘response’ to being harassed on street is not moral outrage, but the moral outage!

Forget the dirty leering, unwelcome touching and obscene gestures but even using seemingly ‘innocent’ names like ‘sweetie’, ‘beauty’, ‘babe’,etc. may appear harmless at the outset but the point is, it is NOT your right, place or privilege to do that to a complete stranger. It is NOT flattering, it is not wanted. It is not welcome. JUST STOP IT!, for it is a woman’s space too!    Oh! Also, did I forget to mention a dress is not an invitation for sexual harassment?
‘He’ does not have to be FOR ‘She’. He and She can definitely co-exist but only if there is room and respect for both on the streets, in the restaurants, in the means of public transport, in the theaters, hell, even in the dark alleyways.  We don’t need sermons on ‘feminism’ and ‘gender equality’, just sanity and common sense. ‘ShewithHe’

-Urooj Fathima